Stupid, Tasty Dim Sum...

Since Mondays suck (I still have some unfinished work that I have to tend to after today’s blog entry), I’m going to carry on about yesterday. The best thing about Sunday’s besides not having to work is the lunches. I’m a big Sunday Lunch man myself, and believe when it comes to Sunday Lunch, one should eat hearty.

Il Leone is one of those gems that has a great relaxed, homely atmosphere; amazing food (freshly made pastas and other mouth-watering Italian fare); professional and efficient service; and best of all has a reasonably priced menu. Perfect for lazy Sunday’s, and thus the destination for our feasting.

It may be a relatively new comer to the Cape Town restaurant scene; but Il Leone is part of a restaurant chain called Mastrantonio, and its winning formula has been tried and tested in Jozi. The original Mastrantonio can be found in the heart of Illovo and is well worth the visit if you are ever in the area.

The one thing I did do a lot while I lived in Johannesburg, was check out Restaurants. My good friend Stef, perhaps the only other person I know who loves restaurants more than me, compiled a list of spots that I needed to try out. And so systematically, one by one, A to Z, I began a full blown assault to tick off all the restaurants on the list.

Amongst those restaurants, is one which I have grown to respect and fear more than any other restaurant on earth, The Orient. The Orient is an up-market, East-meets-West type establishment, found at the heart of Melrose Arch, and in my opinion, is one of the best restaurants in the City of Gold. But underneath the façade of decadence, lies an evil, so cleverly disguised that you would be forgiven; to mistakenly pass it over as just a delicious and delicate morsel.

The Dim Sum, little Chinese dumplings, there are literally to die for…and literally die, I almost did! One evening while sampling the delicious variations, a bogey (a Pork Sau Mai) slipped under my radar and somehow lodged itself at the back of my throat! My first reaction when it happened was to try swallow harder, but the more I tried, the more it got stuck. I couldn’t breath. I was panicking. I was blacking out. I didn’t know what to do.

All I could do was get up and signal like an idiot and hope that someone would pick up that I was choking. Thankfully with the help of my, then digs mate, Nkosinathi Watson and good old Mister Heimlich, coming to the rescue; impeding doom was averted. If my friend hadn’t been there to help me, a minute or more and things could have ended up like a tragically dark, comedy; me killed, by a stupid little pork dumpling! Man, would my face have been red…or in this case dead.

It’s weird how a near death experience can psychologically affect you. For a while after that experience, it was always at the back of mind. And for some time after the muscles in my throat would tense up every time I swallowed, causing me to almost choke again…

To prevent future disasters; I read up a trick, so that next time, should I ever be caught in a similar situation I’ll know what to do. I’ll share it here just in case one day someone needs to use it. Supposedly if you’re choking with no one else around; you should try to find a hard object, like the edge of a table or the back of a chair and fall hard onto it. You have to land on the part of your abdomen just below where your sternum connects to your chest plate; and the impact of the fall should dislodge whatever you’re choking on. Be warned though, this maneuver could cause severe bruising, winding and perhaps even some broken ribs…but at least you'll be alive.