Sunday, November 30, 2008

Ship Steering

6am is hell of a early to be up on a Sunday morning, but I’m up in any case. Sunday is basically the only day I have the opportunity to sleep in, so it’s rather annoying that my body clock has decided to wake me up. I lay around tossing and turning for a bit and couldn’t get back to sleep, rather than wasting my effort, I decided to do something a little productive and write in my daily journal.

The only problem is, I don’t know what to write about, there’s about a million things processing in my head at the moment, but none really worthy of being penned. Nothing is harder than trying to force something to happen when, well, it doesn’t want to happen. Whether it’s this blog entry, trying to fall back asleep or one of the many challenges that face you in life. I guess it’s sometimes a good philosophy to just go with the flow and see what happens. To accept that sometimes we are merely spectators watching a play unfold before us.

Sadly, the result of such an approach is that more often than not, not everything turns out the way we envisage it, however we just need to accept whatever the outcome and make the best of whatever situation arises. It’s really difficult and I’m still trying hard to find that balance as when to let things go and when to take control of the proverbial wheel and steer the ship on its course.

I believe that both are necessary, if we live our lives too candidly without regard of consequence, things quickly start to fall apart; however if we are too controlling we will most likely be dealt a harder hand in dissapointment.

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Biting the Hand That Feeds You

The stupid hamster bit me. Luckily it didn’t draw blood, so at least I don’t need a Tetanus shot, but still, I feel betrayed. You raise the little critter, give it a home, then wham! It nibbles on your finger like an entrée!

Speaking of nibbling, woohoo for waffles, I had a Belgium waffle earlier from Gelato Mania with Kinder Joy gelato and Ferrero Rocher chocolate sauce. It could well have been the greatest (definitely sweetest) 10 minutes of my whole week.

Have you ever had that urge to get something off your chest, but you weren’t sure if it were the right thing to do or say? But if you didn’t you might completely regret it? I find myself in that predicament all too often and again, today, find myself wanting to do something that I’m not sure if I should.

I've always adopted the gung ho attitude of rather just get it over and done with but in past experience sometimes it's just better to let certain things slide on by, as often, instead of the result you expect it just opens up a whole can of worms…

Friday, November 28, 2008

Wake Me Up Before You Go Go

The trouble of waking up really early in the morning during a work day is that by midday it feels as if it should already be the end of the day. Technically you've spent more hours awake compared to if you had woken up later.

The only way I survive when that happens is by overdosing on coffee. So guess what, I'm already on my 5th or 6th cup today, I had to keep alert as I had some important meetings to attend. As a result my eye has developed a nervous twitch, I've got heart palpitations and I feel as if I'm having an out of body experience, but at least I've stayed awake and brought my A-game to the table.

The other problem with waking up ridiculously early is the fact that there is absolutely nothing to do, no one is awake and nothing is open. I sat there bored out of my mind staring at the wall, I even resorted keeping myself entertained with some work before the gym opened up its doors.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Abomination

I may be pregnant! Yeah, you heard right, at least all the evidence is pointing in that direction!

I'm not certain I know what's going on with my body at the moment, some have told me that it may be the after affects of the flu that I recently had. But lets look at the evidence as to why I've come to this damning conclusion: Firstly I've been experiencing quite a lot of heart burn and headaches as of late; and yesterday besides feeling incredibly hot; in the evening. before going to bed, I had a sudden craving for Spur Spare Ribs (the craving was particularly specific, it had to be Spare Ribs and it had to be from Spur). This morning I started feeling queezy. Not to mention the fact that I've never in my life menstruated - missing menstrual periods are another clear symptom of pregnancy.

Bar the fact that it's anatomically impossible for me, a male, to bear children, and the fact that I've been abstaining like a priest... I'm starting to believe that I may not be male at all but instead some abomination of nature, tending more toward the female species than my physicality would suggest.

Woman have been ignoring my manliness ever since I can remember and for some reason decide to have "men-bashing" or "baby-talk" sessions with me in plain sight, accepting me, almost as if I were one of their own. I'm not certain what it is that I project that would suggest that I would be interested in such feminine topics, but have concluded that it must be some hormonal imbalance in my mutant genetics that lull woman into a false sense of security. Also, just the other day a woman off the street approached me and asked : "Please Miss can I have some change?"

Whatever. Maybe I'm just being paranoid with an over-active imagination, but I'm a risk manager and at the moment I'm managing for the worst possible scenario. If I am indeed about to bear a child I'm thinking of the name... Jules, it's asexual enough to fit either a boy or a girl, if it is human at all of course...

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Out the Box Thinking

So i got tired of playing the bubble game last night and decided I'd take some short cuts to beat everyone in our mini-competition. All one needed to do to validate their high score was to take a screen shot as proof of their achievement.

After a few hours wasting my time, I decided the game was frivolous and opened up my favourite image editing tool to up my score a bit. They called it cheating...I called it out the box thinking. Whatever. No rules were established upfront in any case - so if a screen grab was all we needed - I win.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Bubble Trouble

I fear that my daily blogs may become a thing of the past.

I received a game earlier, that may consume most of time in the near future. It's called Bubble Shooter and is highly, highly addictive. The concept of the game is really simple: you get different colour bubbles, and as the player, you aim and try to match up at least three bubbles of the same colour. When you do, they burst. The trick is to try to get a lot of bubbles in one go, you get more points that way; you can even try to isolate other colour bubbles and if they are, they burst too. Its along the same vein as Tetris, only better...

There is mini competition going amongst me and some of my friends, being uber competitive and geeky I will win, and win by a large margin. I wasn't one of PE's top Quake 3 players for nothing you know, and there is no ways I'm going to lose in some silly bubble game...gosh, who knew computer geeks had such big egos?

That's enough blogging. I have some winning to do.

Monday, November 24, 2008

Stunt Rat

Found a nice little surprise in my Inbox this morning, courtesy of my good friend Darryn. I received a couple of screen grabs, one of me getting killed and another of my name in the credit list from the movie (Tunnel Rats) that I was roped into (doing some stunts). It still hasn't come out in South Africa , so besides the trailor I have yet to see any scenes, let alone any scenes with me in it.

It's super sweet to finally get some evidence of my involvement, the experience was so surreal that after such a long time, it seems like only a faded dream. Remember, I'm a boring software developer by profession, so doing stunts for an action film is certainly not part of my day to day activities, only with Paul's expert guidance and training sessions was I able to pull it off.

As I recall Action Dan had a strange, if not misplaced confidence in my ability to play dead and decided to kill me off on a number of occasions. I remember in one particular take, I was killed not once but twice and somehow had to get shot, die, crawl out of the camera's line of view, have my makeup and costume adjusted; just to run back into picture and get killed again. Being killed so many times, the make-up and costume department did well to hide my ugly mug, but I think in one instance there is a semi-close up of my face where I'm actually recognizable (Look Ma! I'm on the silver screen!).

Working on set for the first time was a real eye opener, I felt like a kid again; absorbing new information and trying to take in as much as I could. Tristan, my roomie for the shooting of the film, and I tried to get involved in every area of stunting that we could: we helped out with rigging, performance and doing general errands. After a while we even got so used to handling the AK47s and M16s (assault rifles), we lead some of the training and demonstration sessions for the "new recruits" and in some cases even tested out a couple of rigs. I'm not even an adrenaline junkie, but in one of the tests they threw me out of a 15 m high tree...blind-folded!

Besides the amazing adventure, the cast and crew were all great and I've made some really amazing, life-long friends. I'd have to say that of all the things that I've ever done, doing this film ranks right up there with one of the coolest and most gratifying experiences of my life.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Normality

I’m starting to feel myself again, being back in the gym this morning helped. I’m taking it easy though, not pushing very hard and trying to keep my heart rate low. Grabbed my usual Sunday morning cuppa from the Vida afterward and feel as if things are falling back into place.

I’m not certain how my Sunday became so busy, usually they’re supposed to be relaxing, instead I’ve been zooming around doing odds and ends, picking up people from the airport and helping a friend with some software related stuff. Not that I mind too much, because I’d rather be busy than bored, doing nothing.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Emasculated

The Showroom Cafe in the Grand Daddy Hotel (previously known as the Metropole) on Long Street is a really cool place for breakfast it seems. Being the little sister of the acclaimed Showroom Restaurant in the foreshore, I was really excited to try it out and organized a table for the coffee club well in advance. The cafe is supposed to be simple, no fuss, but still loaded with tasty favourites; and breakfast this morning, exemplified that experience.

Yesterday evening was Andi's birthday celebration. Unfortunately, still feeling slightly under the weather; I only made the first bit of the celebration at Wakame for a drink or two. I did however try to make up for my lack of appearance by getting her some body butter from the Body Shop (I hope you appreciate it Andi because I feel slightly emasculated going shopping there). I must admit, I feel like a bit of a fish out of water in that store and am not certain what half of that stuff is for, but I'm told that girls love it and I'm someone who likes to try explore new territories.

Due to my limited knowledge in the body products area, my general rule of thumb is to go with whatever smells good enough to eat, just a word of caution though,do not eat the products as they taste nothing like they smell and are guaranteed to make you hurl - not that I would know of course, because I wouldn't be dumb enough to eat them *cough* *cough*.

Just to balance the blog off with something more masculine, as I fear all this talk about products has just boosted the levels of oestrogen ...how about the Boks vs Englad game at Twickenham today huh? Anyone going to catch that? That's the sweater knitting finals not the rugby game just in case you were wondering.

Friday, November 21, 2008

Thanksgiving

I haven't been myself lately, in particular the last week or two. To be honest, I'm not sure exactly what it is that I'm going through. All I know is that I wake up in the morning filled with emotion and negative thoughts and honestly I don't know how to turn that around. People say that being positive is about choice. What if it isn't? It's not like I'm not trying. From the get go; I'm feeling down, angry, emotional - so I tell myself, no that's not how I should be feeling. I try my best to lift myself, but regardless of the bravado, things slump and seem to turn out badly. I get frustrated and soon feel down again.

I know that my behavior has been one of self indulgence and believe me when I say, if I knew how to get over this more quickly, I would. Perhaps I'm trying too hard to force it, perhaps I should just let it be and not give myself a deadline? I'm strange that way, I'll say "Okay, that is as long as you are allowed to feel down. Now, get over it already". Clearly, it's not working. It just seems to manifest itself later when I don't expect it. Apparently, it's not the first time I've been like this, I don't remember it, but my parents recall that when I was about 5 or 6 years old something happened and because of it, I wouldn't speak to anyone for 6 months. Everyone began to worry. I reckon I became introverted, to work out what was going on with myself.

Close to 20 years later, and I find myself in a similar situation, only this time, I've taken a different approach in handling things. I've been very vocal about how I'm feeling, in the form of this blog. This will sound strange, I don't particularly like airing my dirty laundry in public, I'm actually a very private person - I'd rather hide behind closed doors and deal with it by myself, but for some reason it feels like there is some greater purpose as if by documenting what I'm experiencing, it could help someone else who's reading it...when I started writing about 7 months ago I made a commitment, I told myself that I would write an honest account of what was going on in my life and how I was feeling.

A lot has happened in the past year and to the best of my ability I've tried to stand by that commitment; even if I've felt like I'd be revealing too much. Again, I'm strange that way, if I make a promise; even if it's to no one in particular I'll try my utmost to hold up my end of the agreement.

Thanksgiving has come and gone in Canada, but it is coming up in the States soon. I like the concept: showing gratitude for the things you have. I couldn't find anything to inspire me yesterday. So I thought I'd approach it from a different angle. I looked for things that I'm grateful for. I'm thankful that I have my family and that I have an amazing bunch of friends, who've been patient with me, I really appreciate that...to be honest I don't know where I would be if I didn't have that right now. So while I may not be beaming today at least I'm grateful.. and that's sure as heck better than being depressed, frustrated and angry.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Under Cover

I really lacked inspiration to get up this morning, not quite certain how I managed to claw myself out of bed. With that said, I should have stayed there - in bed. I’m still feeling sick, so I'm not sure why I killed myself to get up and even attempt to go to work in the first place.

At the moment, I’m clutching at straws to draw inspiration; I can't afford to make big changes now, so I’m trying anything, even little things like dressing more casually for work, to get me out of this slump. Regardless of what I try, it doesn’t seem to work.

Being sick, my sense of taste is gone, everything tastes like cardboard, I thought I'd be able to cheer myself up with a burger from Rick's Cafe the other day, no use, no taste. Even the milkshake from the Fire and Ice hotel last night wasn't very inspiring, it tasted like slightly sugary water. Life without taste, to me, is no life at all.

For only God knows why, I decided that taking a different car to work might help change things up a bit, so I borrowed my brothers car. In the parking garage, the person who parks next to me, usually parks poorly. Most days, I avoid this by coming in earlier than her, but this morning, she was there, parked, teetering in my lane. I tried to squeeze into my space and be ultra careful, but somehow managed to scrape the rear wheel arch on the right side of the car in any case. Great.

For some reason, my savings, always ends up going towards fixing cars. I hate cars. The day they invent a scratch-proof, unbreakable, never-breaks-down vehicle, I’ll be the first in line to purchase it.

I sat in the office for about 10 minutes, sick and seething; stewing in my own filth and misery. I decided to speak to my manager and call off sick. I’m back at home, under the covers. Today can’t end quickly enough – Don’t call me, I’ll call you.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Number 200 - Practice Makes Perfect

Today marks my 200th blog posts, that means I've been writing in my daily journal for 200, no wait excuse me, 198 consecutive days (on 2 occasions I posted twice in one day). I've gotten writing these notes down to a fine art.

Those of you who think I spend hours on these things are wrong, it takes me about 30 minutes to a maximum of an hour to churn one of these suckers out. Initially, they did take long, sometimes up to 4 hours, I found trying to get my thoughts in order and geting them down in writing, difficult. The more one writes though, the easier it becomes and one soon becomes rather efficient at it. Consistency and tenacity I've learnt is a key ingredient at getting really good at something, whether it be playing a musical instrument, training for a sport or in this case writing down thoughts.

Now, I'm not saying I'm good (I'm not there yet), I'm merely stating that I'm better than I was six months ago. Talent can only get you so far, but there is something about constant practice that keeps you poised in adversity, ever noticed how sportsmen sometimes excel more under extreme pressure, it's probably because they've played the situation in their mind so many times and practiced it so much, that their bodies are programmed to do the only thing that it knows how to do. There is definitely some truth to the old adage "Practice makes perfect".

There have been many days where I've wondered if I should publicly post what I've written, or whether I should even write at all. Somehow I've managed. I thought by the 200th post I would have something profound to say....I guess not, perhaps at the 300th.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Mister Grumpy Pants

I'm trying to keep away from over-exerting myself , so I've forced myself to not do any training. Sadly, it is one of the few outlets I have to rid myself of frustrations and I am thus finding myself becoming even more irritable.

I'm regrettably not in the best of moods and it doesn't help that my nose won't stop leaking...while at home, I've resorted to fashioning plugs from toilet tissue and shoving them up my nose, not exactly aesthetic, but at least it does the trick and it means that I can go about my normal activities without having to drip nose juice on everything.

I'm not an invalid when I get sick; you get those who will lie around, incapable of doing anything, and have to get people to wait on them hand and foot. I've grown accustomed to fending for myself. If I were to adopt aforementioned, I'd probably have perished a long time ago, so out of necessity I've developed an "if-my-body-is-capable-let-me-do-it" mentality...the only difference between a healthy me and a sick me is a grumpier demeanor.

Heck, if I knew it wasn't bad for my heart I'd still go training.

Monday, November 17, 2008

Hope

I woke up feeling particularly sorry for myself this morning. Still struggling with the flu, but I knew I had to go into work. They gave me two days off, proviso that I came in on Monday to finish up some stuff.

I've been told that my blog is a decent read, but that the underlying tone is rather depressing. It's taken me a while to write this, but if truth be told I haven't been happy for quite while and it's one of the reasons why I started this daily journal in the first place (as I recall the title of the first entry is entitled Down but Not Out), to try keep track of my progress, record some positive activity and instill some inspiration in my life...

In recent past, I've developed a fake laugh, it kinda sounds like that animated cartoon Goofy's laugh. It's probably not noticeable to the public; but it's almost like a nervous reaction, it's involuntary, but I cringe every time it's delivered, because I know that it's a front to hide my otherwise depressed state.

I guess I'm just tired of fronting, and some of the bottled up angst is starting to manifest itself as aggressive outbursts, which scares me a little. I went to speak to a professional listener, which I doubt I'll be visiting again anytime soon, because all he did was make me realize how unhappy I actually was. What I did take away from the therapist was that I should try face my emotions head on and deal with them as they come, rather than bottle them up. He suggested that I write my feelings down...

I'm struggling to find purpose, to get up in the morning, which is a foreign concept to me. Anyone who knows me well, will tell you that I'm not normally unhappy and that I'm usually filled with positivity. The happy-go-lucky guy that never lets anything get him down. Mostly, I think I'm frustrated, I'm frustrated that every time there is some glimmer of hope it's smothered and squashed - It's bringing out the cynicism in me (which again is foreign).

To name a few things: In the last year and a bit; I've lost faith in love, friendship, humanity...just a small example to illustrate my point (little things like these shouldn't bother me - but they do). On Saturday - I had some leftover food from a braai and was walking down the street, when a beggar asked if he could have it; most probably, as was my assumption, that he was hungry. As is my nature, I obligingly gave it to him - it was some pasta salad and a little bit of leftover fruit salad.

After giving it to him and while I was walking away he called me back to say that I could have the fruit salad back and throw it away because he didn't like it and wouldn't eat it. I was seriously annoyed with his ungratefulness, I called him an "Ungrateful Bastard", and at the time wanted to take one of his crutches and smack him with it, luckily for him, there were people around and I somehow managed to restrain myself and walk away.

I struggle to figure out where I fit into the greater scheme of things, I've developed a sense of self identity but it's difficult for me to place myself in a social context. I've always been different. I'm a first generation Taiwanese - South African (let's not even go into the politics of the difference between Taiwanese and Chinese people - if you think South African politics is confusing, your head will explode with that one) origin, who grew up in a predominantly Caucasian environment, so have never really fitted in. I look different. Never really been fully accepted. And probably why I usually find myself lonely, single.

In Taiwan, it's even more difficult to fit in. I look like everyone else, but I've been brought up different; culturally, I dress different, I talk different, hell, I even act different. And that too can't be accepted, a Banana they would call me, yellow on the outside, white on the inside. In a way, that's even more hurtful, to be rejected by your own kind. I guess that being categorized by the South African government as being "Black" is almost appropriate, as it not only shows how confused the rest of the world is, about placing me, but also reflects my own state of confusion.

Bless my parents, who have always been there for me; but they too can't seem to identify and are not always able to relate to what I'm going through. As in most cases, there is a loss of translation between generations; but added to the rift is a western cultural influence which is undeniable. They were brought up Chinese, I was not; and at times, it feels like we're talking completely different languages.

The only person I think who I can fully relate with is my brother, he was brought up in the same circumstances, yet we are two completely different people (no! we are not twins), him being more intellectual and head strong, while me being more heart. And yet again, we seemingly pass each other - like ships in the night.

I know this much, that in all my confusion I have built my own identity. I've tried to take the best of Eastern and Western influences and have somehow come up with my own, moral framework which at times is even more stringent than both. It has caused me to place high personal expectations on myself and evidently, on others, and I suppose, I become disappointed when these expectations are not met. High personal expectations are a form of self validation methinks and nothing I do is ever good enough... Have I fully accepted myself then?...

Perhaps I'm just highly strung, over thinking things as usual and need a holiday. Although I did ask for one; I still managed, somehow, to get the flu and therefore not really have one (at least I wasn't sick the first half).

Recently, friends have been going out of there way to show me a good time. But I hate it when people try to make me drink, I lack the enzymes to process alcohol, as is the case with most Asian people originating from the Pacific Rim; and while it acts as a mood enhancer for most (I must admit I'll buzz for the first 30 minutes or so), it seems to exacerbate my depression.

So there you have it, if you've noticed a depressing undertone in my writing, you were right.
But you shouldn't worry, I'll find my feet again, I always do. I used today's entry as a bit of an exercise to try help me identify why it is that I'm feeling so down...

I never said that I didn't have issues; but at least I'm trying to work through them. The one thing that I do wake up with, is hope. Hope that the new day would bring about something better, less confusing. I just wish it would get here quicker. I guess, patience is a virtue I need to learn.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Lasagna Test

Since the first coffee club meet, I have never missed a single one. Until yesterday that is. There was a gap where I lived in Johannesburg and couldn’t make it - but I had my own little coffee club meets, either at Tasha’s in Atholl Square or the Vida in 24 Central anyway.

The reason why I missed it, was because I just needed a break, a break from everything, including commitments or any form of decision making. I’ve spent the entire weekend being selfish and doing what I want to do. It was great, almost liberating in some ways,;I see now why no one ever commits to anything in Cape Town.

I was supposed to meet up with some people at the Organic Market as well, but that didn’t happen either, because I grew lazy and played with my hackie sack by the pool instead (I’ve learnt I’m still not very coordinated with small flying objects).

I did try to organize a dinner with some friends at Zucca at some point though. Zucca is fast becoming one of my favourite restaurants in Cape Town, besides the great food, ambience and exquisitely decorated venue itself, the hospitality is immaculate and one definitely notices the hand of friendliness owing to the family which runs business. I noticed that most of the patrons in the restaurant were repeat clients and were even on a first name basis with the owners.

I organized a table for 6, but as it happens in Cape Town, no one could commit and the party of 6 quickly dwindled down to a party of moi. Usually, restaurants get quite perturbed when something like that happens but the folks at Zucca went out of their way to find me a quiet little table to myself.

When I’m at an Italian restaurant, I have what I call the Lasagna Test. Considering all things equal, I’ll order the Lasagna and test it to see if it is up to scratch in comparison to other Italian Restaurants that I’ve been too. That’s how I compare Italian Restaurants.

Already having the Pizza and being quite impressed, the Lasagna Test was just a mere formality to see if I would recommend and continue my patronage. Needless to say Zucca passed with flying colours. One could tell that the pasta sheets were freshly made and the combination of Bechamel and meat sauce was perfectly combined to produce a near faultless Lasagna.

I’m lying sick in bed again. Which is my own fault actually, I never fully recovered from the flu last week and in particular have been feeling rather ill the last couple of days, but have pushed on in any case – I certainly should not have done that run on the beach earlier in the week, in this condition, as I felt my chest tightening up and I am sure that it has some how contributed to the way I’m feeling now.

As I mentioned previously, I haven’t taken off work in close to a couple years and I wasn’t going to let something like a little flu stop me from enjoying my break either.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

An Ode to Love

I found an old poem that I wrote years ago, of which I’ve long forgotten for whom and for what reason I wrote it for; but it was when I was a lot younger, way more naïve and still a complete hopeless romantic.

Either way I thought I’d still share it, perhaps someone else will find some truth to the words:

An Ode to Love

Untainted passionate bliss
Translated through a subtle kiss
Her eyes gleam with unspoken attraction
The heart filled with sudden affection
A touch as soft as feathers
More valuable than expensive leathers
The taste of a good red wine
Helps to create a seductive rhyme
The comfort of a warm embrace
The end of his fall from grace
A love which is so pure
A broken heart it could cure

Friday, November 14, 2008

Arrrr I'm a Mighty Pirate

It’s a rare treat for me to walk around the city during the day. Even though I live in the city, I miss the hustle and bustle due to work obligations, so it’s quite interesting to see how it actually springs to life when I’m not around.

Anyways, to cut a boring story short, while walking down somewhere to meet someone (you’ll have to excuse the vagueness of my descriptions here – but no it’s nobody of ill repute in case you were wondering) for an appointment. Out the corner of my eye I noticed a street vendor, trading in medicinal goods, with some Reflex goods. Yip, the Reflex packaging is that damn attractive – man! Whoever’s responsible for that brand here in South Africa sure is/are good.

At first, I thought that the product might have been a rip off, but on closer inspection it was the real deal. I inquired how much it was and the lady gave me a price that was well below our cost of importing even when I was still involved in the company. Unless the Rand has dramatically strengthened and my brother and co have decided to deal with hawkers, the street vendor must have acquired the product through channels of pilferage.

I had the idea in mind to shut down that operation, but on consideration I realized that the poor street vendor was probably just trying to make a living and feed her 5 children somewhere. She probably just sourced the product from someone else in any case; whatever the situation I decided to just let her be.

I’m not going to tell you the exact whereabouts of where this street vendor is, because I don’t want you cheap bastards looking for it and buying products from there (sorry, but I know I’m pigeon-holing everyone here…but I know I’d probably do it too). It just irritates me that some people work seriously hard to get a product like that out and someone comes along, steals it and sells it as their own.

It certainly makes me think twice with regards to the issue of piracy and I’m certain that what I felt today is what some people in the music and film industry feel like when they see all their hard work littered across the internet.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Take a Break

After a couple of incidents, one in traffic and one at home. I decided that I needed some time out, regroup and think about some stuff. As such, I’ve asked my work for the rest of the week off. I haven’t taken a day off work in close to two years.

The only problem is I don’t think I’m capable of relaxing. Even though I’m off work, I still got up ridiculously early and decided to hit the gym. I spent most of last night and this morning designing a banner and beautifying my public blog space. It’s not a difficult task especially since the gorgeous Josephine (I miss you!) and my mate, Darryn let me use some pictures of theirs. So all I had to do was conjure up my limited image editing skills, which I learnt from uni and play around until I was semi-happy.

After my little spate of design work, I decided that I never really get a chance to visit my favourite coffee spots during the week, so ended up doing a mini-coffee tour of Cape Town. I hit three of my favourite spots: Origin, Loading Bay and Giovanni’s all in a row.
As a result I’m buzzing from the caffeine at the moment, and any ideas of taking it easy has just fallen flat on its face or at least for the next hour or so…

I’m not sure what I’m going to do next, the idea is to relax and take some time to reflect and introspect. I’ve decided not to make any commitments or decisions until Monday and just go with the flow to take up some much needed me-time. I was contemplating just hopping in my car and driving down the coast to look for waves, but decided against it because I’d end up being more tired when I got back.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

In Repair

I had a weird day yesterday, an emotional day, in the end a good day but a really long day too. I only caught about an hours sleep the night before (hence the very long bit) and was up bored - so the only logical thing for me to do I thought, was to wait at Wembley Square till the gym opened so I could murder my legs.

I spoke to my mom and dad afterwards; as my mom had to fly back to Taiwain in the morning, unexpectedly, due to my Grandfather falling quite ill about a week ago. History it seems, has a way of repeating itself as this happened not more than a couple of years ago to my father's father.

Work was business as usual, but I had the opportunity to pop out to lunch to visit good old Ernst at his new offices, it's quite a sweet spot in a new development called the Upper East Side in Woodstock. I reckon it will be the Wembley Square of that area, Wembley seriously gave some life to the Gardens area. The cool thing about his new work place is that all the meeting rooms are named after surf spots, well it's cool to us at least, because we surf - kind of - I can count the number of times I've been surfing on my fingers and toes over the last 4 years (seriously not good) - I've become that guy I always used to hate, that stupid, sell-out of a hack that claimed that he used to surf but doesn't anymore, because it's too much of a mission to drive and look for waves.

On my drive to Ernst's offices I noticed that a few blocks in the CBD had been closed off by police and the fire brigade, I figured that it must have been as a result of some accident at a construction that was going up, most probably caused by this outrageous wind that we've been experiencing, courtesy of the cold front; and here i was, thinking that we were at the end of winter. I actually made that whole accident part up, I have no idea why they closed the block off - I just have an over active imagination.

Later, I had a good chat with a couple of old friend and was able to talk about some things that have been playing on my mind that I haven't really been able to tell anyone else, it was pretty emotional; I've been avoiding some of these issues for a very long time and I guess it was good to just talk about them. There's nothing worse than carrying emotional baggage around, because it eats away at you like a cancer.

I think I've gained some clarity and found some peace in letting these issues go, so in the long term I achieved a lot. Times are tough, that is without a doubt - but attitude can make it a heck of a lot easier, it's easier said than done, but finding good, even small things does help.

Monday, November 10, 2008

Tomorrow’s Blog Today

I’m feeling rather proactive, so I thought I’d write tomorrow’s blog today…hmmm that sounds a bit like the Reflex (check out the new online shopping feature) slogan “Tomorrow’s Nutrition Today" , which by the way, if you think you’re being particularly witty about and decide to ask me the question: “if I eat tomorrow’s nutrition today, then what will I eat tomorrow?”, rather keep it to yourself. I’ve unfortunately heard it on countless occasions while still on board at Reflex and each time I’ve had to deliver the same fake laugh…

This whole proactive vibe that I’m on is pretty cool though; in addition to the aforementioned feat of writing tomorrow’s blog today, I’ve also pre-cooked and prepped my next four meals and neatly stored them in my freezer, so there’s no excuse for me to be tempted by impulsive junk food habits.

Speaking of nutrition, training and other such things; I think I may have overdid the training a bit. I hit quite a heavy weights session at the gym earlier this morning and then decided to hit another big interval training session this evening; on my run back home from the gym I had a bit of an episode of up-chucking on the side of the road – not particularly pleasant, not particularly elegant and not particularly good for one’s body either.

After a hard session you should feel pushed, but if you’re training correctly you should never throw up. My biggest mistake was that I was using my sessions as an emotional crutch to vent frustrations and pushed a little too hard especially on the last leg; which was probably also not the best of ideas after a bout of flu... perhaps I need to find another vehicle other than training, blogging and cooking to relieve this angst?

Eyes Glued Shut

It's a little bit freaky when you wake up in the morning and you can't open your eyes (literally). I woke up finding that my right eye was glued shut by some gunk.
A clear sign that my old friend Pink Eye (Conjunctivitis for those of you who are interested in the medical term) had decided to come pay me a visit. Luckily, I learnt as a young whipper snapper to stay calm and use a warm, wet face cloth to gently wipe away the gunk. When my eye eventually opened, sure enough it was as pink as candy floss (yum).

After last weeks flu, I'm sick and tired of being sick, and of course staying at home. Not that I consider Pink Eye being sick really - it can just be mighty infectious (there's non-infectious Pink Eye as well) ; so I figured I'd go about all my normal daily activities: gym, work etc even if it was infectious. If anyone else catches it...well lets call it my little gift. Seriously, no need to thank me.

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Civic Duty

I was at the Jan van Riebeeck High School, the most logical and probably the closest place to where I currently live for voting registration (in South Africa, you have to register at the place where you are going to vote); when at the last minute, I decided that I was going to keep my registration at the Walmer Town Hall in Port Elizabeth. Not the most convenient, but I figured it would give me an excuse to travel down there during election time and give me an excuse to go see my friends and family….Killing two birds with one stone, so to speak.

The trip to the high school wasn’t all in vein however; since I was in the area I thought I’d try out the pizza at Zucca. It is arguably the best pizza I’ve had in Cape Town thus far. The bases are as thin as you like and the toppings and tomato base are fused together to create a flavour sensation that is indescribable. I think I was a Ninja Turtle in my past life, I love pizzas that much.

If I finally figure that I’m being ridiculous about flying all the way to PE to vote, I still have tomorrow to re-register.

Friday, November 7, 2008

Vampire?

I'm usually pretty happy when the sun is out. I love sun. Unfortunately today, the sun and I are not friends. My skin is still sensitive from the flu, so it aches when it sees the sunlight. I never thought I'd live to see the day that I would actually prefer it to be cloudy and gloomy.

I think that there may be an alternative explanation to this tingly sensation I'm feeling upon entering the light - is it possible that I may have been attacked by a vampire at some point and am in the process of turning??? Dum dum dum (Eery music)! It's the only explanation I can think of that makes sense to me right now. I mean, I may be wrong but it's doubtful, I'm usually right about these things, case in point, remember how right I was with regards to the alien invasion being averted about a month ago?

Well if I were all of you, I'd be watchful of me. Better eat a lot of garlic; carry stakes, holy water and crosses around...you may look a little crazy and smell bad, but it's better safe than sorry... Just a small request though, please don't slay me when I turn, I promise I'll be a good vampire, just throw me some viles of plasma from the blood bank at the hospitals...

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Sick at Home

I can safely say that after spending a couple of days sick at home, that there is nothing exciting to watch on the idiot box. Trying to entertain oneself without exerting too much energy seems a rather impossible task.

Even worse is that I’ve been trying to catch up on some reading, but the throbbing headache that I have doesn’t make it easy. The only solution I have is to recover faster and to liberate myself from this vegetable like state – I’m trying to “will” myself to health – so far so good, I may not be feeling any better, but there is nothing to disprove my theory that this optimism will work.

In science, the only way to prove that ones theory is incorrect is by disproving it, and since no one has, I am certain that I am accelerating my road to recovery. My, I do have quite an imagination.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Yes We Can

I woke up in the wee hours of this morning feeling ill: my temperature up, my skin aching, my head pounding - the overdosing of vitamins for the past few days was only a futile attempt to delay the inevitable and inevitably I had caught the flu that my brother had been harbouring.

I went back to bed, oblivious to the changes happening oceans away, only waking to a world changed. A president, a new leader, of the free world had been chosen. And like my flu it felt inevitable. When I first heard of the name Obama spoken to me by a friend, Katy a couple of years back - before his campaign trail - I had a feeling in my gut that it was only a matter of time before his words would be heard, his light would shine and that he would set an example to the world.

To many, Obama’s victory signals change - an end to a struggle, the end of a government who would not listen. But in his acceptance speech, Obama is well aware that this is only the beginning of change - “This victory alone is not the change we seek, it is only the chance for us to make that change.”

I recall whinging about a terrible year and could not recollect anything great that has happened, perhaps I should look at it in a new way, perhaps we needed to struggle to understand the good that we are about to see. Perhaps this is the year where things change for the better, where despair turns to hope, where promises become action and where the persistence to preserve reigns.

I’ve tried to equate Obama’s victory with my personal life. And although not much has changed the situation since my whinging, words to inspire hope have entered my life. The power of speech and the written word should never be taken for granted and every time Obama speaks, it sends shivers down my spine. He inspires hope and hope is something that I – we, all need.

All that I have to do now is to get over this damn flu, and I’ll be ready to tackle the world. Yes, yes I can!

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Flu Buster

Joe's been sick with a fever lately. And since I've been training quite hard, my immune system is not at its peak performance. I felt like I was catching it and feeling a little out of sorts yesterday evening so I've, again been nailing the Viral Choice and Vitamin B complex to prevent catching it.

I've also been consuming this weird concoction from Kauai called the Floo Fighter, it's some sort a Chai Tea, Ginger, and Tabasco mixture that tastes like death but seems to work wonders - I had a scratchy throat and a bit of a headache earlier, but they've vanished since drinking it. My theory is that the tatse is so terrible that it kills almost everything it comes into contact with, I've proably even put my own life at risk, but because the strongest survive, the virus/bacteria are gone but I'm still here - alive and kicking. I also figured it would be a good idea to stay out of the gym for today to alleviate the chances of it getting worse.

Otherwise holding thumbs for Obama today! I'm really hoping he wins by a landslide, so we don't have to go through the whole electoral college debacle that seemed to transpire in the last couple of US elections.

Monday, November 3, 2008

Obama Mania

Tomorrow the 4th November is Election Day in the United States. Although, I may live all the way at the tip of Africa, I'm still watching with great earnest to see what the outcome of these elections will be. Being the world's most powerful country, who ever is at the helm of the Oval Office will inevitably make decisions which could affect the rest of the world.

Living in such interesting times, with the world seemingly, spiraling out of control, the citizens of the US have a big decision on their hand and in my opinion can ill afford to make a mistake. If it were my choice (unfortunately I can't vote), the choice would be simple: Barack Obama would certainly be my choice for president. Besides agreeing with most of his economic and foreign policies; and his effortless poise (unlike an un-named predecessor) when delivering key note speeches (amongst other things); I believe that Obama is the right candidate for the job. Politics aside, his character more than anything is the reason for my endorsement.

From reading his book Dreams From My Father, I've developed a tremendous liking to his honesty, determination and level-headed approach to most issues and events. He seems to be an individual who understands himself, his faults and is willing to correct them through thought and reason. In such turbulence I believe that a leader should posses such qualities.

In the words of Russel Peter's: "Be a man, do the right thing!" - Vote Obama! (If you are a US citizen and can vote of course).

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Rejuvenated

Had such a relaxing evening last night, been feeling completely worn out lately and felt like I could be on my way to catching something. So I decided it was a good idea to pop some Viral Choice, Vitamin B, stay at home and go to bed early.

It’s amazing what a little bit of R&R can do for you. I feel like a million bucks today, and quite rejuvenated. Bring on the week, I’m ready…I think.

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Business 101

If their business strategy is to turn away customers I’m going to help them. You see I’m all about helping people, and it was made perfectly clear to me that Café Gainsbourg in Kloof Street wanted to keep their clientele small.

We were supposed to have coffee club there this morning, but due to the poor response from the owner we decided to move to another venue. I had dinner at Café Gainsbourg on Wednesday evening to suss the place out, and to see if it was a suitable location for our club. I spoke to one of the waiters about our little get togethers and indicated that we would like to hold an event there on Saturday. I asked for advice on the best way to approach it. The waiter suggested to arrive on the day, the staff would then make a plan.

After arriving this morning, the club tried to organize seating with a waiter so the members could sit together as a group. As we were rearranging some tables, the owner approached us and told us that we were not allowed to move the tables in her restaurant. She became quite rude and told us that we should have made a reservation. It wasn’t even that full.

I tried to reason with her that I had come in on Wednesday and had spoken to a waiter and that he had said that there was no need for a reservation. She expressed that it was not his restaurant, that it was not how things were done and that I should have spoken to her. I then began to explain to her that I had no idea who the owner of the restaurant was, because of the waiter’s suggestion I did not make a reservation and thought that they would be more that happy to receive about 20 peoples worth of business. I guess I was wrong. She was unswerving and suggested that she did not need our business. Needless to say, the group was quite unhappy with the poor service and decided to move.

I’m certain that one doesn’t need a degree in business to see what type of repercussion her actions will have on her business. She not only turned away 20 willing-to-pay customers on the morning, but perhaps turned them away from ever returning; added to that the poor impression left with the 20 people (in various areas of influence) will most likely spread and deter once-potential customers.

If I were in her position, I would have certainly, tried to have been more accommodating. I’m not sure when things changed, but I miss the good old days when business owners took customers’ needs seriously and adopted “the customer is always right” attitude. Unfortunately, because of today’s incident Café Gainsbourg has lost my support.

It feels like I’ve been ranting a lot in my posts as of late ... It’s not really my style to rant and to be negative; but I’m finding it rather difficult not to, it seems like I’ve recently come across a myriad of people who are rude and have no respect for others.

To break the negativity and spin some positive, good old Arnold’s down the road came to the rescue, and were more than happy to welcome us with open arms. They have great breakfasts for a reasonable price and most welcomingly they have an open door policy and always greet with a smile.